Times like this…

Dear Grape,
Hope your last day of workshop went well. I am so proud and happy to be with a guy like you who is strong enough to have dreams, moreover strong enough to chase those dreams. Cannot image more and better than that.

You completely deserved a holiday and pump up surf trip. Hopefully the waves will be better than ever for you. I will make my fingers crossed whole day. I have just spoken with Peach over the Skype. Well just write to each other and she told me what happened between her and Carrot. Seems like there is not any specific reason for them to break-up. It is more like Carrot does not know what he wants he is quite in a depression. Is it possible , can you please guide him. When I say guide, just ask him honestly what exactly happened and if there is any possibility how they can fix it. Some times people needs to hear shits from their friends even though they know what it is. maybe he is not happy in Wonderland or he does not have any friends, maybe he is so homesick and wants to go back to Troy for a while. Just talk t with him please?Will ya

Talking with Peach made me really upset. She sounds really down but trying to hold on to there. I mean it must be horrible for her to be left alone in some country that you came for the guy you love with your daughter leaving everything behind.

Then I thought about us. How hard was sometimes to be with you. How impossible it looked. How I wished to be disappeared in the balcony of our house when I was crying and you were dumb, had no sense how I felt whatsoever. It was indeed hard times. But at the same time I am looking at the times like this year. How precious was every moment of it and how much I enjoyed to be with you. I am imagining you are lying next to me in the bed and making me laugh again or slightly touching to my legs with your hands but the feeling is so strong that I am craving for it now while lying in this big bed all alone.I am thinking about you most of the times. The actions I am taking is bounded with you. It starts with “if”s and finishes with “wish”. I never missed you this strong before. It almost hurts. There is a sore spot on my chest. And the time like this I feel even more insecure. The times like, when I heard a most adorable couple that I know have broken up and they do not even know exactly why. The times like this, I feel like I need to hear your voice to be sure you are real, you are still in my life and still loves me. And everything is worth what we have been gone through. You miss me over there as much as I miss you over here. I missed your smell in the bed, in the pillow covers. I missed your chest hair, that gracefully curls and looks so sexy on you. I missed you walking with boxers that has holes in it so I can make fun of you ever again. It is stupid I am wearing your tshirts at home and washing them in case you would notice, Because I do not want you to know how much I love you. It is embarrassing, and scary. What if you are not missing me this much or loving me. I would not have told you all this if I was not sober and drunk, but I am. I am writing an this buy I will be regret by tomorrow morning.

Please write me something that proves you still love me. Times like this I might need to hear it again. Just because I know bad things happens. Not only to bad people but also good ones.

I want to know that we are still at the middle and holding onto each other tight. I love you Grape.
Do you?

Love Pomegranate xxx